Out of Gas

That's how I feel for the last week.
Hell, who am I kidding - more like the last 6 1/2 months since little miss has made her arrival.

Like I'm literally on E, I'm puttering on and not sure how much farther I'll make it.
I'm in desperate need of a gas station - or in my case a "sleep station".

Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't change it for anything, and I would gladly gave up sleep for the rest of my life if it meant keeping this sweetpea happy.

But mama's wiped out. Like exhausted.

So much so that when she woke up @ 2:00am last night after not going down until 10:30pm (after quite the struggle might I add) - I laid in bed and sobbed.

The h - being the doting dad that he is, got up with her and told me to go to sleep. I couldn't. Instead I got up, rocked her and softly hummed "twinkle, twinkle little star" after my 10th go round she was back asleep, only to arise again @ 4am. You get it right? This is pretty much our nightly routine - only most times she is in bed by 8pm and up anywhere from 11-12pm and again a few more times. Oh and did I mention she's in bed with me?? Yeah. She is. Has a total meltdown when we put her in the crib. But at this point honestly, that's the least of my problems.

These last 8-weeks have been rough and I really am at a loss as to what to do next. I know she CAN sleep through the night! She did it around 8 weeks, and lasted a good 2 months.

But lately - if we've had 3 nights of consecutive sleep that's saying a lot!!Everything I read online suggests this is normal for her age, between teething and growth spurts and babies learning to soothe themselves to sleep, this is pretty much par for the course.

Friends / Family have suggested putting her in her crib and letting her "cry it out". I can't. I've tried. I physically get ill. They say eventually your baby will get tired and eventually fall asleep, thus learning to self soothe and fall asleep on their own. Nope. Not my girl. After a few failed attempts, that lasted over an hour she just cried, no - actually hysterically screamed, not settling down, only getting more and more worked up. While I? Laid on the side of her crib and cried right along with her. I've read online for a select few babies, cry it out DOES not work! Of course I have that baby.

Last weekend I started gradually putting her in her crib for naps, hoping she would get used to it. The first time she slept an hour and a half (woohoo); the second and all subsequent times after - SCREAMS. Ugh.

So my question is, moms - what did you do?
Am I sabotaging Sophia's sleep by having her in bed with us?
By not letting her cry it out?
Is my bedtime too late?

Help. I'm about to break.